Mortal Kombat with Josh Jurgess

Join us for the once every 3000 years epic fighting competition for German chancellery, Merkel Kombat, with special guest Josh Jurgess @fresh_knuckle_sammich

Starring Ash Blodgett, Bret Eagleston, Samantha Willson, and Pat Edwards

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Below is a rough automated transcript of the episode. We are working on making this better:

Bret: Welcome to another episode of let's ReWatch the show we watch movies that we loved in our youth and find out if they're still any good I'm Bret.

Pat: This is a this is Auntie banter Zone.

Ash: Antique Bruce banter though.

Bret: I love it Bruce banter the f****** Hulk radio show.

Sam: That is so good.

Ash: I love it and imagine all the like ridiculous radio jockey like sounds he would make.

Bret: Just be lots of Smashing sounds.

Pat: Shoe commercial.

Ash: Oh man.

Bret: The Hulk would have a great second career as a Foley artist.

Sam: I think he can really only do one sound effect.

Bret: Hey when you do one thing well that's all you need.

Ash: Yeah it's like The Wilhelm scream but for smashing.

Bret: Speaking of Wilhelm scream we've got a gas today.

Ash: Somebody's in my room Guys somebody is in the room another human being besides rice.

Pat: It's coming from inside the house.

Sam: Ash is this your first houseguest in over a year.

Josh: This is the first time I've ever been in their house and I'm shy.

Josh: You guys live like this okay.

Ash: Yes we have been we've been talking from balconies year.

Josh: Like I was saying we should hang like hang our clothes on clothes lines across from their balconies like we're in New York.

Ash: Yes.

Sam: Get some tin cans.

Ash: Yes exactly exactly but yeah last night was the two weeks after second vaccination so we painted the town we went to a bar with Josh it was crazy.

Pat: Oh wow you are right all over it.

Bret: Oh yeah they had it marked on my calendar.

Sam: Trader Joe's is awesome.

Ash: I went to Trader Joe's guys I went to Trader Joe's like such a basic b**** and I loved it.

Josh: You might not be able to tell from the camera but she is glowing right now.

Ash: I really am.

Bret: Josh's who now.

Ash: And he just let himself in today he's a professional post supervisor he is also has been a professional Candlestick maker which is a whole conversation we still need to have really.

Pat: Josh do you have.

Josh: I was hoping you guys wouldn't say anything about that like I mean like I'm trying to Rebrand.

Pat: Please tell me you have a friend that makes pastries for a living and one that makes works you meet for a living.

Sam: Ashes the baker.

Bret: Yeah listen it's that the pandemic has created Baker's of of many people that everyone was a baker now.

Josh: Three Horsemen of the Apocalypse.

Ash: Yes yeah you know who could be our butcher would be RJ he definitely RJ.

Josh: Just sharpening knives all the time.

Sam: Archie is a Pitmaster.

Bret: He's the Pitmaster for sure.

Ash: Oh that's true he has a freezer full of pig a whole freezer.

Pat: That does not surprise me at all.

Josh: I was hoping you're going to say a whole pig.

Ash: Adidas do it is a whole pig in the freeway he showed me.

Josh: I once called him friend now I call him food.

Bret: He was just like you want to see my pic.

Pat: Is it.

Ash: I mean not that creepily by pretty-much.

Josh: You know I like red flags.

Ash: Yeah yeah.

Bret: Don't worry it won't bite it's in pieces in my freezer like.

Ash: Check out this freezer that's large enough to fit a human the standing freezer in my garage.

Josh: With really weird recipes attached to it.

Ash: Yeah I mean.

Bret: Bringing back the the flashbacks of like impossible knowledge information that I only have from watching CSI and like MythBusters about like did you know that they that they can use a pig as a stand-in for a human body when they do ballistics testing like I don't know if that's true I know I seen it on TV.

Ash: You're like I know now but I don't know that I wanted to know thank you.

Bret: If you came to me and we're like you can use a dummy that mimics blood and send you or you could use blood and sinew attached to this actual blood and send you think I'd be like.

Josh: I like to be hipster about my forensics.

Pat: It's not though.

Bret: I wonder how much knowledge you have in your head that you only got from TV.

Sam: So much.

Pat: I know I know it's like 97. 60r so of it.

Josh: Yeah I mean like if you look at like Forensic Files back then like you learned the lesson of people just didn't lock their doors back then it was just thinks this wasn't nobody locked their doors and it's perfect if your murderer.

Bret: I mean listen to the lot of people that listen to the show surprisingly don't just live in LA and New York and they're living in a town where people don't lock their doors still like everywhere else we go in the country doors are unlocked but.

Josh: I never locked my doors I was waiting for somebody to come in.

Pat: My doors are locked.

Ash: Josh used to live in a cabin in the woods guys literally.

Bret: Bandit 2.

Sam: A log cabin.

Ash: What really.

Josh: Dude yes.

Bret: You're up and log cabin.

Josh: I was like I was like chopping wood for heat.

Josh: It's nutts I wrote three Bon Iver albums while I was doing.

Ash: But then he stole them and took all the credit.

Josh: I found out that he wrote them likely earlier but you know that's for the jury to decide.

Bret: Speaking of fantastic music.

Ash: Oh yeah.

Bret: That that that that that.

Pat: I'm so excited I'm so excited I forgot what we were doing and then we were texting earlier cuz we were like who's going to host this thing as lightweight what's movie again you were like Mortal Kombat.

Ash: Yes.

Bret: That we done this before we've done this before where it was somebody that wasn't me it's got the song wrong.

Pat: Appreciative that.

Pat: No I'm pretty sure it was you that one.

Ash: No no no fuk U pad it was you spacejam you know you were doing the Space Jam.

Bret: Patek review.

Pat: Play.

Ash: Occupat try to push it on me goddamn.

Ash: Okay.

Josh: As the lyrics are Mortal Kombat test your might.

Pat: What was the recent episode where I said this music in the movie Sounder.

Ash: Was the Space Jams yeah yeah.

Pat: Oh.

Bret: I turned it into a whole song I it will have played already on the podcast I will be inserting it.

Pat: You were saying the thing I was doing sounded like the Mortal Kombat thing and I said it didn't sound like that.

Ash: Yeah yeah.

Ash: But I was on your side Pat.

Bret: Anyway.

Ash: What's okay.

Pat: Oh I know know know I was perfectly accurately mimicking the Space Jam theme with my mouth Brett was mishearing me to think it was Mortal Kombat so the flowers with Brett it just cuz you can do your technical audio Wizardry.

Sam: SEPTA professional musician.

Bret: Listen I didn't change s*** from why you saying that.

Ash: Case I know you're listening the slaw was with Brett is the new t-shirt that I need Maids thank you very much.

Josh: I just want to make clear that I immediately was thinking about you riding the subway melting the space jams.

Bret: I'm going down to the Space Jam.

Ash: Space Jam.

Josh: You know what that was a banger.

Bret: Good chance do your dance in Space Jam.

Ash: It was pretty good.

Pat: Okay I need I need in actually the Space Jam theme but about lyrics about Mortal Kombat so it's really upbeat and happy like that but it's about like ripping spines out of people's packs and stuff.

Ash: What.

Pat: Gonorrhea through your throat.

Josh: Natchez spinal cord that's a combat.

Pat: Welcome to the Mortal Kombat X Kombat and its mortal you're welcome to die yeah.

Josh: Killed my partner.

Bret: Let's talk about Mortal Kombat.

Pat: So we are doing.

Ash: Yeah.

Sam: It was that late.

Bret: 95.

Pat: The original night the 1995 Mortal Kombat film adaptation of the popular video game franchise 895.

Josh: They made it after the second Mortal Kombat.

Ash: What's your Space Jam.

Pat: Yeah that one was my part Jam that Mortal Kombat Mortal Kombat 2 and super Street the two fighting games I was like most into and actually beat were that Mortal Kombat and Super Street Fighter II the one for the Super Nintendo which of the one for Super Nintendo was.

Bret: Did you ever play Street Fighter the movie the game.

Ash: That's a thing.

Bret: I have I have that for Sega Saturn.

Pat: No we still have to do that movie though so has to do with the new one that just came out.

Josh: Absolutely yeah so in advance I watch the new one.

Josh: And guys I got to say it's incredible it's it's it's like a fast and furious movie with martial arts.

Pat: That I've also seen it that's a very good actress and Brett have either of you seen the new one.

Bret: Not yet.

Ash: So I just I saw like the HBO before it came out was like here's the opening scene and I watch the opening scene I was like okay whatever.

Pat: My like.

Bret: Glowing review.

Pat: My two cents review of it we're here talk about the 95 on the my two cents into a review of the new one is.

Pat: Entertaining like very good like video game me martial arts action personally I did not like the plot the storyline of it like the writing no not really.

Ash: Is it not the same as the original.

Bret: I read a review that contain the significance spoiler that if you're all okay can I share it.

Bret: Now.

Ash: I haven't seen any of it.

Bret: Watch it eventually absolutely I will.

Pat: I believe I believe Asheville intends to watch this movie Brands and like I don't know if you guys will but I mean Sam especially butt.

Bret: Mortal Kombat.

Ash: Translate.

Bret: Sub-Zero.

Ash: I do know that Sub-Zero I mean I didn't know his name but I I did see someone get frozen into ice.

Josh: Did you play the games.

Ash: No well I know nothing.

Josh: Everything you know about Mortal Kombat is going to be found out in like the next hour.

Pat: Oh okay so.

Bret: All you need to know.

Pat: So ask if I were to say.

Ash: I am Jon Snow I don't know I think the only thing about Mortal Kombat I've ever seen is Brett and I and a high school friend went to a pizza parlor where they finished entire Pizza I don't know if it was you or if it was Raven who finish the entire pizza but then you played Mortal Kombat while I watched you play Mortal Kombat that's it that's that's all guys wait.

Pat: If I were to make the super hilarious joke and say you thought drop Josh your neighbor in the balcony and talked about doing podcast and then you said to him get over here that doesn't mean anything to you.

Ash: No it doesn't know.

Ash: I know that this is the base this is the thing where they say like finish him right.

Pat: Yes yeah okay.

Josh: Commonly commonly confused.

Ash: Oh my mistake my mistake sorry let me close that folder hold on.

Bret: There is that there was a parody of this movie and that's actually where that came from.

Josh: Kumbe.

Ash: Hahaha.

Pat: For some reason I don't I did not look this up if I knew every Josh if you know they spell combat with a K they've always done it since the game came out I don't understand why it's not like if if the.

Ash: It's not spelled with a K and I'm just kidding I'm just kidding I'm not that dumb.

Ash: Right yeah.

Pat: No I'm saying I don't get it cuz if the first word had also started with a k or was like killer combat if it did I would see you okay you're doing like this like a literation thing were like if it was like killer Kombat you would turn change the sea and combat to a k but it's Mortal Kombat I don't know it was just seem so Superfluous to me I'm actually kind of interested now.

Josh: Maybe she's because the K has more points like more things to kill you.

Bret: It's a dangerous letter.

Josh: Is a very dangerous one of the most next 2X.

Pat: Dangerous right next to most dangerous letters.

Ash: That's true and then why maybe why.

Bret: That's the gender gender-neutral term for its Mortal Kombat but with combat.

Pat: This movie was directed by Paul WS Anderson.

Pat: Who has directed the bunch of the Resident Evil movies.

Bret: I love the Resident Evils.

Ash: No relation to PT Anderson.

Pat: Not Paul Thomas Anderson. I would love to see yes.

Ash: We might be crazy about it would be crazy.

Bret: Paul Thomas Anderson.

Josh: I don't know if you guys do this but if you were to make a Resident Evil movie The litmus test is making a Mortal Kombat movie.

Pat: But.

Josh: Mortal Kombat I mean he's probably really good in Resident Evil.

Pat: He also did a Event Horizon.

Bret: Really.

Josh: No you know what I take back everything I said.

Ash: You speak about what you've done.

Ash: Oh the first was great.

Bret: The Resident Evil movies got off track a little bit but I think even today. First one started off real strong like I think it might actually be a very good movie.

Pat: I think it's the only one I've seen.

Ash: Beto.

Pat: Do some of those.

Pat: Some of those for the show.

Bret: I've seen I've seen many of them and they.

Josh: Guys guys I've seen all the trailers.

Bret: By the time they got to like 6 it's just unhinged it doesn't make sense anymore like Milla Jovovich could just like fly or something I don't know it's.

Ash: Six of them Jesus Christ.

Josh: The fifth one is just her shooting in the side of a barn for an hour-and-a-half like ideas.

Pat: Yeah if you told me there were anywhere from between 6 and 9 Resident Evil movies I would not bad and I I feel like it was ten or more I'll be like oh really and it was less than six or five I be like that's it I'm pretty sure it's between 6 and 9.

Bret: Are there is.

Ash: I am only aware of one and I'm shocked that there's more.

Pat: How do you say.

Bret: I haven't done the research but I believe there has to be an Adam Sandler for every genre and Milla Jovovich is the Adam Sandler of Zombie Gun 2.

Ash: Absolutely.

Ash: Yeah yeah.

Ash: Oh great sign good sign.

Pat: I love it I Can Dream though just get some kind of cash cow franchise even if it's not like the most mainstream that this consistent and you just every couple years every other year or so you're like shirts or you want to pay me like four million and there are three writers credited the first two are Ed Boon and John.

Josh: Pastor writer writer in a desperate attempt to save it.

Ash: Yes exactly.

Ash: Okay okay.

Pat: I'm assuming my reading of this three is one of them really did the actual like writing writing of the screenplay the other two were kind of getting credits so those two are Ed Boon and John Tobias who are the creators of the games the video games so there I'm sure they were involved in the process and then there's a gentleman named Kevin droniak who is got a handful of other screenwriting credits under his name so I imagine it was option there's like we're going to make this thing.

Pat: You guys are the creators you know your lord you're going to be involved but we're going to give you this like vetted professional screenwriter is going to be your like babysitter is my imagination of how that went but it's nice I actually appreciate that they had the.

Ash: Okay guys today we're going to tackle the inciting incident.

Pat: Fun fact there's a character in later games called Noob Saibot is like a secret character that you can unlock or just like a shadow.

Pat: Noob Saibot it's it's cuz it's Boon and Tobias backwards the creators or last names bun and Tobias Noob Saibot.

Ash: Okay sure.

Josh: What you got to do the secret stuff.

Ash: Not surprised.

Bret: There's a green one.

Ash: Yeah everybody.

Pat: I I went through it but I went through a little listen I definitely was Mortal Kombat stand in the 90s Tiffany play to hit you so I kind of messed around those games do you know how many variations of like the the Sub-Zero ninja they made they made tonsil it was Sub-Zero and Scorpion everyone knows those two blue and yellow the same ninja design there are likes there like 6 of them.

Bret: Is it was the green one like reptile there's smoke.

Pat: Yes yep reptile smoke Noob Saibot is another one.

Josh: Not wearing a mask now.

Pat: I hate it when I had it with no mask I hate it when have no mask.

Josh: Always dress like a hot dog vendor now.

Pat: Hahaha.

Bret: I can't believe I just named five of potentially six variations I haven't looked at this game in or movie in since high school.

Josh: I saw you reading your hand.

Pat: They were slick me they had a couple of like basic frames of characters no just reskin them and call them different characters there was another one there's like this like cyborg character there's like Cyrax and Sektor and yeah.

Ash: Wait so this was like this is like a street fighter ask game bright.

Ash: Oh okay.

Pat: Wow that's so insulting I don't know which came first but yes they were like direct they were like big the big competitors of each other in the 90s I feel like at least an.

Ash: How is that insulting you been.

Pat: You're basically giving Street Fighter the credit of being like.

Pat: The.

Ash: I'm just saying it's the same style.

Josh: Hey guys I'm going to I'm going to open this up for discussion if that's okay so okay so let's say Coke vs. Pepsi like what would be the coke what would be the Pepsi Mortal Kombat.

Ash: Oh.

Pat: I'm really sure.

Josh: And we can keep this going.

Sam: Which one came out first.

Pat: Yeah I'm actually looking I'm actually looking at.

Ash: Is Coke yeah I agree.

Bret: Games vs movies right cuz I feel like the game Wise Street Fighter all the way Street Fighter II Turbo like that's the only fighting game.

Pat: Street Fighter was first.

Ash: Otoscope.

Bret: Movies of Street Fighter never landed a movie like.

Josh: Maybe I should have been more specific Maybe.

Pat: I mean I like that movie that we need to do that for the show we need to do the Street Fighter movie.

Bret: I desperately want to.

Ash: Odisha movie.

Josh: Maybe I should have said maybe I should have said Are You Afraid of the Dark or Goosebumps.

Bret: Are the add-on this show it's which ones which one's the Armageddon and which one's the Deep Impact.

Ash: Yes okay.

Ash: I don't know who that is.

Pat: Also it stars your favorite jcvd Jean-Claude.

Josh: Yes.

Josh: I believe he does the splits to write.

Ash: Give me that but give me by Jay-Z.

Sam: Yes.

Ash: We in this movie or know the street fighter dammit dammit.

Pat: And he doesn't he doesn't know this Street Fighter 8 doesn't get crazy Flex with his bicep and he's got an American American flag tattoo on it it's like.

Josh: I was born here.

Josh: I support you but.

Ash: Oh my god well we we need to watch this movie obviously I support this.

Pat: It needs to.

Bret: Raul Juliette has in that movie the best monologue of any movie ever.

Pat: Tuesday the Tuesday monologue.

Josh: Yes yes.

Ash: Okay yeah.

Pat: Call Yummy's going to be like 3 days it's like little koalas a little chocolate cream inside of them it was like that but it was like that but peanut peanut butter-flavored so it's like.

Josh: I'm getting really sick of sending them threatening letters like you guys can help me.

Pat: Oh my God Josh I can't believe this yes I totally forgot those but yes I fully remember there now it was like a three-dimensional peanut look like a peanut but it was a cookie shell would like peanut butter inside of it.

Bret: Mr. Peanutbutter mr. Peanut so I can like do I not bleed peanut butter.

Josh: Apparently had bad Vision in one eye with that monocle.

Josh: It's in my bad I.

Ash: Please bring it back.

Pat: There's a whole website okay there's a whole website devoted to that PB chris. Com is a hole like fan site dedicated to them and like giving you links to contact Hormel Foods and petition to bring them back to join the bring back TV Chris movement oh my God.

Bret: Is there a f****** change. Org petition.

Josh: They recommend that you send them letters with magazine letters.

Ash: Spent a lot of money on this website it looks pretty f****** good man even have a poll showing that PV Chris are the best.

Bret: Vtiq Squarespace ad.

Pat: This is amazing.

Josh: Will you put two votes in for me and be great thank you so yeah we were so my brothers and I would be snacking on these PB crisps and I would be kicking their ass as Johnny Cage just doing Flying Kicks over and over again which would end lead I deleted like literal violence against me.

Bret: That's what I remember from the video games the most is like more so than the fighting was the Sean Connery asked like name announcements for everyone and Johnny Cage really sticks out cuz it was like.

Pat: Do those get when he's like when you selected them Sonya Blade Sub-Zero.

Josh: I remember I remember when Johnny Cage 1/2 he went and then put his son Jesus Christ.

Ash: Oh man.

Sam: Yeah totally.

Pat: Sam you were obviously huge fan of the games right you are a f****** you were just MK till you die right.

Sam: Is Sean Lowe that Street Fighter Chun-Li is Street Fighter yeah that's that's my knowledge.

Ash: Right there with you Sam right there with you.

Josh: This is Star Trek and Star Wars.

Sam: I think I do know that Mortal Kombat has the logo with the Silver Dragon right.

Pat: Yes it doesn't have dragon logo.

Ash: Yeah wait okay good.

Josh: It is whatever color it feels like being though.

Sam: Oh okay.

Ash: Oh.

Pat: Changes colors but it's it is a dragon logo good job.

Josh: Like a chameleon.

Sam: Alright well that's what I know.

Ash: It's always chasing that color dragon.

Bret: We can birth certificate to the girl from The Ring is just like.

Ash: Hey great Halloween costume this year.

Josh: It sounded like an airline pilot like.

Pat: Favorite.

Josh: Grand Canyon.

Ash: Yeah.

Josh: And they're always talking to you like their hero I just want to remind you that your life is in my hands right now you should probably be really stoked.

Pat: Ask Brett Sam I'm going to assume I know this answer for Ash and Sam have you have you seen this movie before.

Ash: No no.

Bret: I thought we went and saw this in high school.

Ash: Based on Oliver knowledge.

Sam: 1995.

Bret: No the second one is a second.

Josh: Pictures of it's a shame.

Pat: I mean it's not a continuation of that story but there was this one there was a sequel after this one and then.

Bret: And they released the first one in Napa at the downtown theater while we were in high school.

Josh: Like how many times can I watch a spider by Peter Parker Jesus we know the story.

Pat: Okay that's good so.

Pat: It was a very popular video game in the 90s obviously enough to make a Hino.

Pat: Motion picture out of it other than it being an adaptation of video game.

Pat: Do you all know anything about it like the premise the story.

Sam: There's a story.

Pat: What it is.

Josh: Is there.

Ash: I mean I'm a.

Pat: I will let you know what I will I will vouch for the story I like I like this movie I like to listen to see I enjoy it it it's special place in my heart I think it has a story but.

Ash: You think you think was the key word in that sentence.

Pat: I mean yes there is a story there's a story there's a story here.

Ash: Okay.

Josh: It's somewhere in there.

Ash: Yeah.

Pat: I'm just trying to understand where you're coming from before we go into money game cuz they have no frame of reference I feel hikes I was just.

Ash: I have no frame of reference I've never played the video game I.

Pat: Yes let me.

Bret: Street Fighter.

Ash: I don't know anything about the movie I can only assume like I said that it's like a versus Style game but I don't is it like an ark was it an arcade game that's my assumption.

Ash: That's what I said if he yelled at me.

Pat: It's like Street Fighter it's like it's it is like no you didn't just say it was like Street Fighter.

Josh: It doesn't have Blanca you know everything else is the same.

Ash: I said it was a street fighter ask.

Pat: Yeah I'm going to I'm going to describe the game I want to do I'm going to describe the game okay and then we'll do money I feel like what do money game but you so and you can extrapolate based on that so the game is yes a 2d you're fighting it that's it you're fighting each other you pick your character your pointed fix their character your CrossFit student you know you reach at one end and you do punches you to kick easy to super powers at each other and you try to make the other one dead and like in Crazy different locales like there's one that's like really popular or famous is like you're on this bridge and if you up or someone they fly down in like hit a bunch of spikes at the bottom.

Bret: Yeah that was the real big differentiator between the franchises is Mortal Kombat if you hit someone hard enough another level.

Ash: Another level.

Pat: Yeah so Morrow is big thing is it was similar Street Fighter Street Fighter was much more like colorful bright colorful kind in the cartoony almost where is Street Fire Mortal Kombat super Glory super visceral it had a feature called fatalities were once you beat someone there to be kind of all days at the end and if you knew the right if you punched in the right like sequence of buttons you would do some crazy animation like Sub-Zero would freeze them and make their body shatter scorpion would rip off his mask and have a skull face in like to shoot a fireball item I think reptile would like shootout something coming in like rip their head clean off with it and stuff like that like but you have to put in.

Ash: Play this was in Mortal Kombat.

Pat: This is Mortal Kombat yes Mortal Kombat whole thing was like Street Fighter but glorious f***.

Ash: Hell yeah.

Bret: And now it's like the games continued with that to the point where like people were getting those articles about people getting PTSD from like seeing the murder animations in Mortal Kombat.

Josh: It shaped my life.

Ash: Really.

Ash: Mamta troll.

Pat: Or they definitely caught flak from the 90s the conservative the conservative 90s mom Patrol definitely they caught some flak from them like it is too violent for children.

Sam: The video games cause murders crew.

Pat: Yeah yes so that you know.

Josh: A sharpened brace.

Bret: No one ever died before Mortal Kombat.

Ash: It's true though you know I mean it's a fact.

Josh: Y'all these kids are ending up super existential we got to do something guys.

Bret: The ones the one thing I'd like to know is is there anyone famous in this.

Pat: There are a number of people whose I believe faces you will write you might recognize as far as names.

Pat: Yes.

Ash: Number of people's faces that were cut off and placed in this film.

Pat: Nowell call household names like I don't think I recognize these names will definitely recognize their faces like one of which is Christopher Lambert.

Pat: Was the main character in The Highlander movies.

Pat: She's done a super distinctive kind of raspy voice that doesn't look like it should come out of his face I'll say I feel like.

Josh: I don't think so.

Ash: Wow.

Pat: His voice does not match his face.

Pat: It's like he's got the voice of this like ancient Sage he's always had since you don't like me like 20 or something like that like his voice sounds like she'll be coming.

Ash: You know what that comes from smoking a lot.

Bret: If he rated.

Josh: He is rated.

Pat: Kids rated.

Pat: Yes which also is.

Pat: Definition whitewashing.

Ash: I don't know why I said it means nothing to me I don't know who Raiden is but I still got excited.

Bret: It's going to mean something.

Ash: Is the bad guy right.

Pat: And then another gentleman whose.

Ash: Educated guess no okay.

Pat: You probably will recognise any action movies martial arts movies is Carrie hiroyuki tagawa.

Pat: And again but you will recognize him he plays Shang Tsung who is the bad guy anyting expose Exposition the s*** out of it.

Ash: I mean I didn't know there was a bad guy so.

Pat: I mean it doesn't this movie definitely has some strong Exposition moments are steaks here is here is premise here are steaks.

Pat: Bridgette Wilson who is Bridgette Wilson at the time now Bridgette Wilson Sampras she was Veronica Vaughn in Billy Madison.

Josh: Yeah.

Josh: Yes that's right.

Pat: Susan House on Haunted Hill she's in Last Action Hero she's another person you will very much recognize once you see her.

Ash: I have not seen any of the things you just listed.

Pat: Is everything Billy Madison.

Pat: Ash Richmond that for the show.

Josh: Because we know it holds up.

Pat: What else she was in the ocean you seen the wedding planner to JLo Matthew McConaughey she is his Matthew McConaughey's fiance who he leaves for JLo.

Ash: Oh okay I mean I don't really remember that movie but okay.

Bret: I need the cast someone with a lievable face.

Pat: And then there's a handful of other people I feel like you might recognize their face but they're those are in their name I feel like their names are even less noble than these folks.

Ash: Okay.

Josh: There's a Goro you might remember him from cheers.

Bret: Coral want to go where everyone knows his name.

Josh: He walks in the door everybody go school.

Josh: Oh yeah.

Pat: Have you actually the voice of Goro is very prolific voice actor Kevin Michael Richardson who is done but Jillian things voice-over wise.

Josh: A bad lot of bad movies.

Ash: 7 what is it again Kevin.

Pat: Kevin Michael.

Josh: Amy just from Ninja Turtles 2 alone.

Ash: Ninja Turtles 2 alone.

Pat: He's done tons of stuff on.

Josh: King size catalog.

Ash: She's sorry I just I just IMDb to him and it says well-known king-size actor pretty good.

Ash: Yeah.

Josh: Yeah I mean that is somebody positivity that I could get behind.

Ash: Yeah.

Pat: What a great descriptor again another way in which men get better treatment than women in our society instead of curvy curvy actor actress and it's like no like no motherfuking king-sized.

Josh: Cash would that be after that be insulting if someone referred to you as queen size.

Ash: Queen-size queen-size it depends if they were a gay man.

Josh: I hope so.

Pat: We've done the cast.

Ash: I mean yeah.

Pat: God dammit.

Bret: Maybe it's a dick thing.

Pat: Okay it might be.

Ash: It's always a big thing.

Bret: Sorry Pat.

Josh: That's what the synopsis for the show set.

Pat: Good yes.

Ash: Case another shirt for you always add a Spangled are you.

Ash: Okay.

Pat: This one is going to be I feel like with the exception of Josh I feel like the three of you or get adjust you might as well be wearing blindfolds and throwing darts.

Ash: Okay what's this a studio produced film though am I allowed to ask.

Pat: It was yeah it's fine I'll let me see if I can pinpoint exactly.

Pat: Budget first I have an estimated budget.

Josh: Oh wow so I thought you guys had something hard plan.

Ash: Okay so Josh what we're going to do this work at a guess how much well sometimes we guess the budget the budget and then how much the movie made well excuse me.

Bret: This is the most expensive fan film of all time.

Ash: Yeah.

Josh: Because I'm so sorry I was the associate producer on this movie to feel like I'm cheating.

Pat: This was a new line Cinema.

Ash: Oh okay.

Josh: Oh yeah very new line.

Pat: Which I think I always think of the Ninja Turtles movie cuz of the logos with the Lichfield Mills always did I thought those were like the ladder that would gliders and does anyone else think ladders on the sides of buildings.

Bret: Yeah I always thought it was ladders.

Ash: No because I'm a f****** film student.

Bret: I'm imagining it now knowing its film and it still looks like ladders.

Ash: I mean I guess I could see what you're saying.

Josh: I just assumed it was always digital.

Pat: What is this video game adaptation about people fighting each other that has.

Ash: Well I don't even know if there's like special effects like I've literally do nothing.

Bret: Okay okay I got one.

Pat: I'll say damn super I said they has I said they have superpowers some of them.

Pat: That's fair.

Ash: I wasn't listening to you.

Bret: I have I have one qualifying question for you Pat 1 qualifying question can you Google for us real quick how what was the budget for the Super Mario Brothers movie.

Sam: No that's cheating.

Bret: Different movie it's a completely different movie.

Ash: No that's cheating you can't you can't do that that's cheating it's still cheating okay.

Bret: Is it came out 93 right so like this was they followed.

Bret: I don't remember though.

Ash: We had to have played the budget game for that we watch that movie.

Pat: Marbles came out 2 years before this.

Ash: When the Super Mario.

Josh: I want I want to make it abundantly clear though when the Super Mario Brothers with the Super Mario Brothers movie came out I was probably like five years old and that's the first time I left the movie theater thinking well that was bulshit.

Pat: Well I'm going to tell you I'm going to tell you Super Mario Brothers budget was 48 million dollars and its cumulative worldwide gross was 21 million.

Josh: Wow.

Josh: Dennis Hopper.

Ash: Ono Ono.

Bret: Thinking is this was two years after one of the biggest failures of video game at at at at at that patients that ever happened.

Ash: Add up.

Pat: But I'll remind you also have one thing it's I mean it's a Sticky Wicket because there's that but yours is point out bright which is fair but I've already said this so this isn't really spoiling cuz you already mentioned there was a sequel to this movie.

Ash: Okay I'm going to guess.

Bret: Yeah but it was like later right like a lot later.

Pat: Not that much later I'll find out how long.

Josh: It's called Mortal Kombat II we can do better.

Pat: Paper they didn't that movie so bad.

Ash: All sequels usually are later I I'm going to guess.

Ash: 55 million for budget.

Ash: Come at me come at me bro.

Sam: I'm going to kiss 17.

Ash: 17 million.

Bret: You know I know there is at least one $500 pair of sunglasses in this movie.

Josh: And their Oakleys.

Sam: That's great.

Bret: I'm going to say this feels like I know there's some stopmo oh yeah oh yeah there's I think there's a wide of Goro that's just like that's a clay man.

Ash: Bono.

Josh: Vitaclay dinosaur.

Ash: Catskills like skeleton.

Bret: I'm going to say this had a budget because just my memory of it felt big-budget it's going to stay like this was 63 milk budget.

Ash: Are you f*****.

Pat: Yash.

Ash: I said 55 55 I know.

Ash: Yeah.

Josh: Our Gang I don't exaggerate I round up so I'm going to say 70 million-dollar.

Pat: Well.

Bret: Late.

Sam: I would like to revise my guess 240 no okay.

Ash: 70 million dollars yeah right no don't boilers.

Pat: Don't don't because winds just takes all your asses it's $18.

Sam: I almost said 18 and then it was 17 after yes.

Ash: Oh my God.

Ash: Terrible terrible.

Bret: Okay so this is either going to look like absolute garbage and my memories are bad or or they accomplished a surprising amount with no dollars.

Pat: I mean.

Bret: Cuz I can remember.

Ash: Another great shirt my memories are bad let's re-watch our new slogan my memories for men.

Bret: I can remember at least four set-piece like cool locations in this movie maybe there's only four maybe they just didn't for really cool occasion.

Ash: And computer.

Josh: So I remember that they had like cutting-edge computer Graphics which I don't know what they're going to be like now I mean but back then it was like I mean.

Pat: This is the same year Jurassic Park came out.

Josh: Yeah I mean I mean like that still holds up.

Ash: I'm sorry are you throwing shade on Jurassic Park.

Josh: 418 million.

Ash: Okay.

Pat: No no I'm saying that just f***** every the other movie that came out around that time that's not amazing this year look like s***.

Ash: Okay okay.

Bret: But also the 18 million-dollar price tag on this really makes it like I was joking earlier but this is Adam Sandler franchise like if they can make a movie for 18 mil it doesn't matter what a Maybach it probably made like.

Pat: So.

Ash: Yeah I mean it had to pull that was my assumption was like that's why I went with 55 cuz I assumed that they were like okay Mario tanks let's throw more money at it but apparently they went the opposite where they're like Mario tanked let's throw less half the money.

Josh: It doesn't matter these combat as I got to play the game no matter what.

Pat: So let's do let's see how much it made Let's do you can give one or both it's what we've got I've got us and worldwide.

Bret: Mr. Worldwide.

Ash: Just pick one it's too much to do both.

Pat: Worldwide okay worldwide.

Pat: They are different I'll tell you they are there different numbers.

Ash: 100 million-dollar Nursery.

Pat: They are different they are different they are different than numbers.

Ash: Oh yeah yeah.

Pat: We have one for the same we've done ones were there.

Ash: Because it didn't have a worldwide release so.

Sam: I'm going to guess that it didn't do great and that it did 65 million.

Bret: This movie.

Ash: That's not bad though that's their money back.

Ash: Doodoo doodoo doodoo doodoo doodoo yeah.

Bret: This movie the soundtrack The theme song was not just from the movie it was soundtrack to people's lives for like it was like the Macarena.

Sam: Wait really that that song is from the movie not the game.

Josh: Everybody shared their first prom kiss like to the Mortal Kombat.

Ash: Hahaha.

Pat: I'll tell you if you want to I'm going to give you most of my trivia supposed to beat post watch but the soundtrack went platinum in 2 weeks after.

Bret: This.

Josh: Yes take that Batman Forever.

Ash: I remember this soundtrack yeah shots fired.

Bret: This movie was a phenomenal success and it made back four times it spreads budget so it may.

Ash: You're guessing right.

Bret: It is yeah that's my guess is it's.

Ash: What is assumption.

Bret: 84 * 1872.

Ash: I'm 30 belly I'm guessing 30 million it's still their money back.

Ash: I still good did you go Josh.

Josh: I have not I have not gone yet however I'm going to say probably Big in Japan.

Ash: TRUE.

Bret: Call Big.

Ash: You have not played this game before.

Josh: And I'm going to go a hundred and twenty million dollars.

Pat: Josh Josh high-five Josh 122 million worldwide.

Ash: Are you f****** serious I said a hundred I said it as a joke.

Josh: You got to trust your gut.

Ash: That is like Jesus Christ how is this not the most successful film ever made at this point.

Bret: Superbad so bad.

Pat: Proportionally well because the sequels are told a piece of s*** that they really f***** it although yes so bad.

Josh: That humbled them.

Pat: A big fun trivia is its they did not get Paul WS Anderson back he wanted to do something different that's what he want to do Event Horizon but then he saw how much he hated the second movie they said about never abandoning a franchise they care about again and that's why he liked went all-in on the Resident Evil movies cuz like I'm sticking with these things.

Josh: Boogie Nights.

Pat: Cuz he's basically like they're like you would like Marlon Brando in Godfather is like a boy.

Ash: There was another movie franchise recently I can't remember which one it was where I was like the director like dedicated their life as like your life has been just making this franchise which is crazy to me.

Josh: Like the Beethoven guy.

Bret: The guy that did babe.

Pat: I mean if a if it if it pays if it's paying the mortgage the sequel Ash.

Pat: I have four dishes.

Ash: What.

Josh: We all know the guy that did babe.

Pat: I don't know how I say I was going like this I think I might actually like this and be motivated to see the sequel to I'mma tell you asked to see those so bad they may catch they make choices that are so baffling this is why I think it is.

Pat: Almost all the main cast back they get one of the main cast performers back for the main role.

Pat: One of the main characters in this movie get them back to reprise their role in the second movie and chill them in the first 5 minutes of the second movie.

Ash: I love that.

Bret: Immediately and then I remember most of the second movie was just them like walking around.

Josh: And the checks keep coming baby.

Ash: Oh no.

Ash: But no but no.

Pat: And what's funny is one of the other main characters they have a different performer playing one of the other main characters and that one stays through the whole second movie into the main character of the whole second movie to think maybe you killed the one who couldn't get the original act that performer back no performer back kill them immediately it's a new performer playing the same supposed to be the same character it's pretty obvious it's not the same person and keep them for the whole movie.

Ash: Oh no.

Pat: Between in between Sam on the budget and Josh.

Ash: Pacman.

Pat: Return that was one of the most that was like one of the most accurate money games I think we've ever died.

Ash: Absolutely yeah that's great.

Ash: I can't believe how much of their money they made back like that's what it was 120 / 8.

Pat: It's more than five times it's almost six times like yeah.

Bret: And just.

Ash: 6. 6 times their money back.

Bret: Squandered potential.

Ash: But yeah man.

Bret: Like six times your money is like f****** like The Avengers money like it's Marvel money you know.

Ash: Yeah no that's amazing.

Bret: Couldn't they could have had the Mortal Kombat Cinematic Universe.

Ash: Sweet did this did this director do the new one since he didn't he would never abandon the series again.

Pat: That's a great question I can give you like 30 seconds Vamp Vamp vamp.

Bret: Going to get snow this is a new game.

Ash: Everybody.

Bret: Vamping doesn't just mean everybody say it right.

Pat: This.

Ash: Everybody yeah Banfield body.

Pat: Just keep repeating band but do it in a Cadence of conversation so Bam Bam Bam.

Ash: It's like it's like when you hear like the rabble rabble rabble so just be like.

Bret: Put the baby on the mic let's see what the baby has to say baby have you seen Mortal Kombat.

Pat: If you would like f*** yet rules f****** rules and Thrones like horns.

Ash: KO.

Bret: Now he's just he's just going to throw up everywhere that's his that's his Jam lately throwing up on things.

Ash: Baby Jam you could bottle you know bottle it inside.

Josh: Farmers Market.

Pat: You're right though Street Fighter did come first so I guess I shouldn't.

Ash: Kikkoman.

Ash: That's right that's right walk it back.

Pat: In the back I'm acknowledging that.

Pat: Ice Baby shouldn't have been upset at you at that moment so that's not walking your back that's acknowledging a mistake and I'm sorry to my friend for being a necessarily hostile.

Josh: I watch you go full circle it was kind of beautiful.

Bret: What do you think's going to happen.

Ash: Was beautiful thank you Pat thank you I think people are going to get punched they're going to get kicked I I hope that there's a dragon because there's a dragon in the logo and it's really a letdown if there isn't a real dragon where's the Dragon.

Sam: There's no way there's a real dragon.

Sam: Don't get your hopes up.

Sam: Unless it's like a special fight thing like they shoot of fire dragon.

Josh: When is 18 million dollar budget you just tell him you'll really punch him just really hit him in the face like we can't fake it.

Ash: Like a dragon punch in it like yeah that would be cool except 18 million dollar budget it probably won't look cool bad I shot the The Fallout parody and I really made Marissa and Alex buttheads for multiple takes and they kept like pulling their head back until like you just go for it and before things anyway.

Pat: I would head but the s*** out of anything if I was going to go swimming I mean look at this thing I can't get it won't hurt me.

Ash: Oh yeah I mean there's nothing to damage their right.

Ash: Love you.

Pat: I mean it's very accurate statement.

Bret: He's got like a brain cell buffer what was it 980f your knowledge is TV knowledge it's fine.

Ash: Sister Patty.

Ash: Yeah.

Pat: Cells that have the real stuff like right the core like ride the sun are protected by just layers of b*******.

Ash: We just haven't checked your hands cuz you're a writer of us to the hands of the value yeah I think I was born optimistic until I found out the budget and I'm feeling like it's going to be very was a 80s did you say the Year this came out.

Josh: 95.

Pat: 95-90.

Ash: 95 okay.

Ash: I mean okay but the soundtrack feels 80s doesn't have Iraq.

Sam: Yes yes no I thought it was like 89 or like 90.

Pat: I feel like it's super 90s.

Bret: Incredibly.

Ash: Okay well okay well I'm with you Sam.

Josh: Why people listen to during spring break.

Ash: I think it's going to be a lot of fun to watch with Josh I think that's going to be a blast I'm not sure if I'm going to like it or not I'm either going to like it ironically or it's just going to be so terrible I don't know but I am excited because I do like martial arts films but I think this is the one of them.

Josh: My life was a spoiler.

Ash: That was thanks that's that I'm done.

Ash: What else go.

Sam: Alright I'm the only other one that hasn't seen this but there is no way that this is a culturally sensitive movie.

Ash: Yeah that's.

Sam: Is a 0hance that that's the case here so.

Ash: Are there scantily-clad women in this film I'm okay I'm just assuming.

Sam: Of course that's that's the only reason for women to exist in in video games and movies in the 90s.

Ash: Oh right I forgot I forgot yeah maybe see it.

Josh: Guys I want to make abundantly clear in the new Mortal Kombat movie women are not sexual objects at any point it's f****** incredible it's incredible yes.

Ash: Well that's good okay.

Josh: Why I wouldn't I wouldn't lie about something so serious.

Sam: I can't tell if you're being facetious or not okay.

Josh: I won't betray you.

Ash: Okay right.

Sam: Okay yeah so I think okay here's what I'm hoping I'm hoping this movie is so bad it's good and that we enjoy it yeah that that's my hope my fear is that it's just that bad.

Sam: And like just terrible.

Sam: Special effects terrible choreography and like a paper-thin plot.

Josh: Rice paper thin.

Ash: You shut your face Josh you show your face.

Sam: Oh no.

Ash: Oh no.

Sam: That's it that's all I can say like I know the song I know the dragon logo.

Sam: And that's that's all I know about this so.

Ash: That's all you needed.

Josh: The whole plot away.

Bret: Well Josh you want to eat want to go next you brought it in what what are you expecting from this.

Ash: Expecting but why did you bring it though.

Josh: What I am expecting is that a why did I bring it perfect yet so I remember as a kid watching this over and over and over again on VHS and I don't know if it was just for the background noise like I'm a mom cleaning the house you know or think what's going on but but like yeah like it's it's seriously like it just always kind of stuck with me and the one thing I remember about it is that when you're watching the movie you can tell what shots they they made for the trailer.

Ash: Yeah.

Josh: Really we're getting really.

Josh: And I also want to put my fist in a man's chest rip his heart out.

Bret: Is that is that what you're expecting.

Sam: Kali Ma.

Ash: What happens if this to.

Josh: Well I mean I mean like.

Ash: Call Yvonne shots at a moment where Indiana jones-style grasses.

Ash: Okay but what do you what do you expected do you think you're going to like it.

Josh: I I think I'm going to like it but just because equivocan self-denial.

Sam: That's a perfectly reasonable response that are podcast like I I still love this because it's nostalgic but not because it's actually good.

Bret: Has a lot of heavy lifting.

Sam: Yeah that's accurate.

Ash: This will be interesting because I feel like if anybody's going to fly kit it'll probably be me and if anybody's going to hate it.

Josh: I'm still rooting for you Sam.

Bret: I'm trying to remember the names of all the characters in this movie and I cannot remember the name of the bad guy.

Bret: Okay cigar.

Pat: Sonya Blade is in this one.

Josh: She's in Sonia.

Pat: Yep.

Bret: Is this one with Sonia was a street fighter song is in there we got we got Sub-Zero scorpion we got Johnny Cage.

Bret: Remember.

Ash: Are you just trying to Name all the characters.

Josh: Tomorrow for sure.

Bret: I just trying to see how much how much I remember cuz I remember the scenes with the minute and I'm like I think I remember most of this movie which is horrifying that my memory works like that is going to be good I think this is going to be surprisingly good because I think the racial insensitivity that may or may not happen is I think they like I think they move the plot very quickly out of the real world into fantasy world where sucking like.

Ash: So you're saying it's forgivable.

Bret: White white guy rating can be wearing the Hat he's wearing it it's whatever like.

Josh: My daughter's not going to marry a Goro.

Ash: Disappointing Sally Bloodsport.

Bret: Exactly I think the fighting is going to be fun if not what I think when I remember when I was a kid is that there's not enough fighting like there's fighting but it's not like I don't I don't know if there's like an extended exactly so this is I think this is this is a magical fantasy Bloodsport because they're there.

Ash: Well I'm excited.

Ash: Yes.

Bret: Because the plot of Bloodsport is also paper-thin like I'm going to just leave me and go fight in a tournament.

Pat: The Kumite is please put some respect on his name it's the Kumite.

Ash: The Kumite please sorry sweetie it's important.

Ash: Yes I'm very excited.

Bret: And I'm fairly certain that this movie is exactly the same thing and if that's the case I thoroughly enjoyed Bloodsport and this is Bloodsport with magic and a forearm giant so Count Me In.

Ash: What what does that mean.

Pat: What it what were the word decide.

Josh: Just thinking the most most literal terms.

Ash: Afore I was thinking.

Bret: Popeye is not in this movie.

Ash: For forearms.

Josh: He beat the s*** out of Bluto it's amazing.

Pat: I predict that this movie will rule hard and everyone will be entertained.

Ash: Will it be better than 3 Ninjas.

Josh: Going to be the same movie.

Ash: Surf Ninjas what I meant sorry.

Pat: Surf Ninjas 3 Ninjas maybe Surf Ninjas definitely f****** not but.

Josh: Johnny Cage fight.

Pat: Could not get enough of ninja s*** in the early to mid-90s hot like just I mean America and young Patrick in general right just like give me all of that like.

Bret: Problematic World 90s was just like so problematic.

Pat: My name is going to be plenty of s*** for us to just tear into and make meals of in the post.

Pat: Watch discussion but I think it will be at I don't think anyone's going to be bored I think the few attempts EG or look like assholes.

Sam: Yeah.

Josh: Yes yes.

Ash: Ono Ono.

Sam: In 1995.

Josh: I'm going to be.

Pat: 18 million budget is really going to show yes really your shoestring budget is showing.

Josh: I'm going to be murmuring to myself oh my God it looks so good oh my God they did such a good job on that.

Bret: I am curious if this is cuz we all know that 1999 is actually the worst year for CG and so this is like we're on the curve down into the pit of despair is it.

Pat: Is one thing in particular I'm thinking about us but I think we're going to have a fun time.

Ash: Okay alright.

Bret: Alright well we're going to pause a recording here and go watch the 1993 original 1995 original Mortal Kombat and God help us.

Pat: Mortal Kombat.

Josh: You might.

Ash: Mortal Kombat song and it fit perfectly.

Pat: Are you saying should should the Mortal Kombat theme.

Pat: Today.

Josh: Yeah like every think like every Nickelback song.

Pat: Are they missing a critical track on The Jock jams album not having I mean it is a sport it's very athletic I think it should be included the Mortal Kombat theme is a Jock Jam.

Josh: I had written a note that said I think this is where UFC got the idea for fight Island.

Ash: Ireland yes oh I forgot about fight Island.

Pat: I forgot two things how much does movie f****** ruled and how f****** god off of a seizure.

Bret: Okay but if we're going to open up with the CG it was it was bad CG but they knew it was bad and they had it like.

Bret: They used it to its best possible effect for being as bad as it was.

Josh: I would say that that the spear coming out of scorpions hand look pretty good.

Josh: Yes.

Bret: Like they knew they couldn't animate the shity reptile dude and so they made him invisible.

Pat: When he was colored.

Josh: But then showed you the other version.

Pat: The colored reptile looks like something a graphic design student does in one of their first like renders.

Sam: Like a vaporwave video.

Josh: That transformation is insane.

Pat: Nothing but.

Ash: Yes we have to address the fact that Brett said at the beginning of his podcast that there was not a lot of fighting and I was parked there is more fighting than there is.

Bret: But like there wasn't no fight.

Josh: The rest of it the rest of it was moral conversation.

Bret: There is no fight that lasted more than like 30 seconds and like almost all of the fighting was either a roundhouse kick or like.

Bret: Not a lot like a backhand.

Ash: Give it to me give me that martial arts knowledge.

Pat: There was a there was a Blitzball punch.

Josh: Yes.

Bret: Oh yeah there wasn't one John Claude Van Damme.

Ash: There was a skull-faced man that exploded and that was the highlight of the film.

Josh: That was the best part of the movie easily.

Ash: May he rest in peace.

Pat: You name-checked I feel like one of the patron saints of this podcast jcvd so the character Johnny Cage was created as like an omage to jump on my damn and they almost got him they almost got him to play the role.

Josh: No.

Pat: Pho Street Fighter cuz he's the lead in Street Fighter Ash each O Street Fighter the movie.

Bret: Wait what we were just.

Josh: Did Bennett different of a movie.

Bret: Trivia Deja Vu because this was another movie that we just watched recently where John Claude Van Damme turn it down to four Street Fighter also.

Pat: Which one was that I forgot what we just watched.

Bret: That was one of my fax.

Josh: Splatoon wasn't it.

Josh: Tune.

Bret: Give me like 2 seconds and then look up the less.

Pat: What was the last movie most recent Monday watch to macera.

Bret: We got we got it couldn't have been Commando.

Pat: Decent amount of how much how much do you always looking it up how much do you love how good is Carrie hiroyuki tagawa as Shang Tsung just chewing scenery Hamming it up just over acting his face off.

Bret: My gosh so good.

Josh: Being a sexual predator sexual predator through the whole thing.

Ash: Everything was so disgusting.

Pat: Why is everything you like this scene is mine.

Bret: His face was so animated it made the CG look better.

Pat: So he was he was there first and only choice for Shang Tsung.

Bret: Amazing.

Pat: Like this is you.

Josh: Or were or were not making it.

Ash: Okay.

Bret: I think it was Stargate by the way.

Josh: Kurt Russell.

Pat: All the Kurt Russell Road.

Ash: Right yes yes that's right.

Bret: Because we were talking about how the Beret made it into Streetfighter instead of.

Pat: How was it hard to understand there is another realm we live in Earth okay I'll do this.

Ash: I just what happened if you.

Josh: Realm I use the word rental.

Pat: Explain this.

Ash: If you had not okay first off number one did not know that they were in another realm until Josh explained it to me not clear.

Pat: What the compass spinning that's like universal sign for we're not in Kansas anymore.

Bret: They explained it verbatim.

Ash: I guess but they were so clearly at Fifi Island in Thailand that it was like.

Pat: Thank you thank you.

Josh: By the way how.

Bret: They explained it multiple times over and over.

Pat: The white man Asian God explained.

Ash: He kept saying that worth your aunt my Island he didn't say that they were in another f****** world.

Ash: Yes exactly like I do.

Josh: And also how does Liu Kang know to look at your compass around everywhere.

Ash: It doesn't make any sense and then like they're just so clearly at this like very recognizable like tourist destination in Thailand that like I can't remove that from what's Happening.

Pat: Island isn't the only place in the Multiverse has tall Islands Ash.

Ash: Alright.

Pat: Okay that's fair your confusion confuses me because Bradley to Rayden laid it out super Point like like just like just like laid it out we're in Earth realm there's another round called Out World they want to invade but there's like four some the one thing why but the fact is they can't invade.

Ash: Okay hold on Sam did you know they were in another realm was it clear to you.

Ash: Thank you thank you thank you.

Pat: Whether or not whether or not they were another round for the fighting I'm saying the fact there are two Realms and one of them wants to invade the other but they have to win 10 Mortal Kombat this is the 10.

Ash: Okay she said that but I didn't realize that the spite like the island they went to was in another realm you know what I mean.

Bret: The thing is is it didn't even.

Pat: They did the whole twirly swirly sailthru.

Bret: Didn't have to be in another realm is I think is the main thing.

Bret: Just been a really scary Island somewhere else.

Pat: I mean yes.

Bret: Human.

Ash: I guess the problem is is the humans along this journey just like accept all of this with like without batting and I there like the dialogue is so bad where he's like well there's one guy who shoots ice in the other guy.

Pat: It was great no.

Bret: We'll see I guess John I guess Johnny Cage didn't understand that they were in another realm either.

Ash: No you didn't.

Pat: I actually I am actually on the team of if something f****** batshit like this happened that more people than we would realize or just be like okay.

Pat: We've all all of our brains have been so conditioned by movies and TV shows of like crazyshit happening.

Josh: You know what you know what I'll say.

Pat: I don't I don't think there be that big of an existential crisis I think it'd be like okay I get it like a big bad guy right there what's the blow up the world we're going to stop cool okay cool cool got it I've seen just like 30 times like okay.

Josh: I've thought about that wouldn't in regards to Life on Mars if they find Life on Mars they will just be like.

Bret: Like it's not that much weirder than real life if Anna like.

Ash: Really shot out of his hand Jesus Christ.

Bret: I don't know about the hand stuff but like.

Pat: Do a Jesus Christ and shoot something out of this and get something into it.

Ash: Didn't my Bible.

Bret: What Bible were you reading.

Josh: Much like rated he sat this one out.

Bret: Middlebelt.

Sam: Ashes Bible goes in reverse.

Josh: That's how you read Hebrew.

Bret: Backwards.

Ash: It's like you know any play like albums backwards.

Sam: Like the edit says hail Satan is that your Bible.

Bret: Goodness.

Ash: Structure was like.

Ash: It wasn't just one scene ex-beatle onto the other and I was like is this part of the tournament or is this guy just trying to assassinate him I don't know what is happening.

Bret: Sam had is the best thought about the structure of the movie and it completely blew my mind.

Sam: Yeah so we should address the elephant in the room here. This movie stole a lot from The Matrix.

Bret: You guys this movie.

Bret: Is exactly the Matrix.

Sam: It's so much The Matrix.

Bret: Like the plot from Flat Rock Point for plot Point minus the computer.

Bret: Everything that happens.

Pat: It's fantasy it's fantasy Matrix.

Josh: I am the chosen one.

Bret: Yeah this guy gets pulled out at like his world into some b******* world-weary like the villain can turn into any any human and he's even ends ends the movie with his f****** like I am the chosen one.

Bret: Is a whole thing.

Pat: You want to do the music is I mean come on.

Sam: Music that the green color grading.

Bret: By the by lighting.

Pat: Hahaha.

Sam: The lake fighting on wires.

Pat: Do.

Bret: Dubai lighting was really strong in this.

Josh: How many times did reptile flip when he did the bicycle kick.

Sam: Yeah the leather corset.

Ash: That's true.

Josh: Nice dress.

Bret: Oh yeah that thing where you can jump up in the air and like does the other floating.

Pat: When he was fighting Sub-Zero a fun fact. When they're fighting there's a moment when Sub-Zero does like some backflip down that ramp and then lucane does is weird little like jump in after him or something the actor who who is stuntman just couldn't get it right and so she's like improvised that looks terrified so like the actor who played Sub-Zero was the hot is he was the highest-ranking like most like highest level martial artist onset Sub-Zero.

Josh: Cover up his face.

Bret: And the thing they had him do was stand perfectly still.

Pat: Very Dragon Ball Z he's Gathering.

Josh: Nice you guys a question.

Josh: Who is enforcing the rules of Mortal Kombat.

Ash: It seems to be the guy who's like.

Pat: Well that's my beef with the new movie.

Pat: Play dresser in the shity second movie it's like there's like these Gods but one of them is like corrupted in the tank for outworld they feel like he likes bucks good cheats anyway bad and also problematic II what is the Emperor who invaded the end is named Shadow Khan is played by a white man.

Josh: Oh as I would have expected.

Bret: As far as the rules enforcement goes I feel like this kind of had a little bit of a.

Bret: Like acab like this is a tournament that we're putting on we made the rules we've got the body cams and if someone breaks the rules will investigated ourselves later like.

Josh: Do these internal searches of bulshit man.

Bret: Like the daughter of the guy that's the judge of the tournament rules is in the tournament are you serious.

Ash: Was he a judge so that's that's what Josh is saying.

Pat: Know the emperor wasn't a judge.

Bret: I thought he was the one that makes the rules work.

Pat: It's a oral.

Ash: Who's the judge.

Josh: He's like a shame.

Pat: Just like it's never explain to this movie it's like there's like these gods.

Ash: Exactly Pat it does matter.

Bret: So there's.

Pat: It doesn't matter you don't need to know is the judge know you know what you need to know there are two Realms one wants to invade the other but the rules say is a f****** matter who sets the rules you just know the rules say they have to beat them in 10 tournaments this is 1/10 tournament you know where in sudden-death overtime. Everything's on the line got to throw up a Hail Mary got to win win or go home and you're to go home to that's it.

Josh: You got to stay here.

Bret: I mean okay first of all the win 10 in a row thing is it's like it's a best of 19 competition that's just a weird place to start with the rules.

Pat: Haley wants.

Josh: We got their asses handed to us 9 times already.

Pat: Also I like that it's once-in-a-generation sick but obviously there's no standard frame for what constitutes one generation considering people from their realm apparently live Ten Thousand Years.

Ash: Yeah that's true.

Sam: It's a time thing like time moves faster on Earth or something you know I don't know.

Josh: Who like Interstellar.

Ash: Hellboy.

Sam: Yeah.

Pat: Get up.

Bret: Curious about the accommodations on fight Island.

Pat: Plumbing.

Ash: Okay I think you I said that to I was like where they saying it's just one fight after another there's nothing in between.

Sam: Firefest a sad sandwich in a sack and that's it.

Josh: I'm going to go watch it for a while.

Pat: I bet I bet the the bathrooms are open-air balconies just pee and s*** off the edge over water.

Bret: Well I kind of got the vibe.

Bret: Can I have this five that the decor was really gross but like my assumption was that if everybody went to their rooms they also would have had like a do bass Feast tables that out that's that scene where Sub-Zero froze the dude like those were obviously just like the people running the island right like they didn't show up the rest of the time.

Ash: I don't f****** know I don't know anything in this movie I don't know who determines who's fighting unlike Bloodsport.

Ash: Yes I wanted some sort of.

Pat: What you wanted you wanted a bracket you wanted to brag if you want him to cut you want him to do that thing where they do like they have they have like a montage of fights and then she like names advancing on a bracket in between.

Ash: Army might make sense of this because it's literally just cutting from one fight scene to the nether with like no explanation.

Pat: Who complains about that amazing.

Josh: We needed a Raging Bull montage.

Bret: Even then it didn't even cut from fight to fight it just cut from like body flop to body flop for like 30 seconds straight.

Josh: It was so long.

Ash: So long brace was like this is like a f****** Family Guy.

Sam: Repeat until funny.

Pat: Sorry about the Garo thing it was just like kicking all the Earth people's butt.

Josh: Imagine Paul Anderson 847.

Ash: Like no concept of even like the layout of the second island because like one seems this doodle be like over here and then the next scene he suddenly on the beach like all the sudden and I'm like what how did what happened.

Ash: Oh my God.

Pat: I'd ever that is that is director brain cuz like the late like cuz that I never ever once have thought about that.

Bret: Thinking about how some of the fight seemed to be like sanctioned and they have like a line drawn in the sand and they had the flags up in the audience and some fights just happened in like f****** scorpions bedroom like.

Ash: The Lord of the Rings area or what was that.

Bret: I think we're talking about the same place.

Pat: Home of the bones.

Ash: Yeah what what what.

Pat: The fight wasn't meant the fight wasn't meant to go there he was like doing some weird teleporting thing and Johnny like jump kicked in it like sent them both in there so.

Pat: If I was meant to be outside in the woods yeah he Shadow kicks thank you.

Josh: Torres Shadow kicked in Shadow tickets.

Bret: I did not notice.

Ash: Words that has like cars in the background notice there's totally cars of the background.

Josh: These trees were planted during Roosevelt's New Deal.

Pat: That would work great that was obviously like it look like a mirror room in like a carnival or it's just like the same tree that was the same tree Sprite ctrl-c ctrl-v need over and over and over again I'm pretty sure that some computer graphic.

Bret: There's some forests that I like that.

Bret: Intentionally planted to be weird grids.

Ash: That's another thing about like where I just felt so someone who has like no I don't know anyting.

Ash: Where the f*** is this Forest on this island cuz he's trees do not look like they belong in the same environment it feels like suddenly were in the US.

Bret: I think we need to Circle back to another realm Ash.

Ash: What's not clear what's not clear.

Josh: Meet me back at Shang Tsung's place.

Pat: They did Magic and they made a little pocket Dimension where they get out their fight simple easy I mean come on.

Ash: I guess I've missed the part that part.

Bret: Hit us with some of the post movie trivia you said you had a bunch.

Pat: So Goro that mean I was an animatronic puppet it took between 13 and 16 people to operate it frequently broke down.

Ash: That was pretty cool I will say.

Bret: Yeah they.

Josh: He also did look like two kids trying to speak into an R-rated movie though.

Bret: They knew that Gora was like the centerpieces to death it was like good puppetry for the most part the face was they sold me on the face they have the emotions going.

Ash: Yeah the face was pretty good.

Pat: His his wife the only parts that the shoot like in the soundstage in La allow this was shot on location in Thailand and places that can only be accessible by boat.

Ash: I know I know it was shot in CFA Island obviously.

Pat: For the fighting of the girl that had the head like sets with a running water it's like for the Foley but they had actually get rid of that cuz they're afraid of going to fall in and it would ruin it.

Pat: Wait for guidance we play IMDb.

Ash: Yes.

Pat: Okay Josh going to play ymd V I'm going to read three trivia facts about this movie one of them is total f****** b*******.

Josh: Right.

Pat: Right here my three total all these are a hundred percent real facts about Mortal Kombat fact.

Josh: Are all three of them okay.

Pat: Fact one they tried to make a new version of the video game adaptation of the movie but had a different production team than that handles the main Mortal Kombat franchise and what came about was more of a jrpg Style game like Final Fantasy and they hated it and it was never released.

Josh: I don't think so.

Pat: Sean Connery was the first choice for the role of Raiden Connery however turned down the role as he wanted to play golf in wasn't interested.

Pat: Smb2 never 3 the medic on set in La also acted as a set security guard the man take a shower really seriously and when Tom Cruise happen to be in the area and came to take a look at the set the Medics sent him Austin's Cruise wasn't technically in the movie.

Josh: Okay alright.

Sam: I think Sean Connery is the LIE.

Ash: Me too.

Bret: I think they did not create a second movie proper.

Ash: That one just feels.

Bret: But they were more movies there's actually four of these movies.

Pat: Movie profit know they it was a video game adaptation.

Josh: I'm going to say the first I'm going with the first.

Bret: I'm still going with the first one I don't like the video game.

Pat: The fellows are right I made up the video game thing that's Sean Connery really was offered and he said no cuz you want to just play golf and wasn't interested in the physical role.

Josh: A physical role.

Pat: Brayden doesn't do s***.

Josh: How it isn't so unhelpful.

Josh: Put together a good team though.

Bret: Raiden Raiden was doing his psych best Will Smith impression with that glass.

Pat: Did you like that rated.

Ash: Minecraft if he so f****** good why is he not just fighting in the tournament.

Bret: He's also from outworld.

Pat: Cuz he's not eligible he's like the guardian number he's not an earth mortal it's a Mortal Kombat he's unaware I know it's going to f******.

Pat: Does it matter.

Ash: Was not explained it does matter.

Pat: Yes that's fair.

Bret: Set it up like Samsung was the guy that was the bad guy and that Brayden was like the guy knows the good guy and they each got to choose their Fighters cuz he was a piece of my Fighters that's what I read into it from that one scene that one line they gave us.

Josh: This was this was Raiden's Moneyball.

Pat: Yes it did feel sometimes.

Ash: Josh had a good theory though he said he was like I think Raiden just has money on this game.

Josh: Is the Petros of Mortal Kombat.

Pat: He's got the energy it's so annoying where it's like.

Pat: They are obviously they're obviously cheating right in front of your face till 2 to win the game but you like I don't want to cheat though cuz I'm better than that yeah but we're all going to die so in there already cheating so we might as well cheat.

Josh: Is catchphrase is I don't think so I don't think so.

Bret: Yep that's a hundred percent hundred percent correct the vibe is just.

Bret: Is stupid a stupid character the real stupid guy.

Josh: You could do better.

Pat: Yeah he.

Ash: He just look like Gandalf the Grey or something.

Pat: Issue with like the do it to is kind of similar where it's like dude f****** just do something cuz the cheating of the bad guys is even worse.

Bret: I like but that's okay but if if gets the souls.

Bret: And he's the bad guy does rain get his powers the same way but he Thailand.

Pat: Paul Anderson the director was so nervous for the film's release he booked a trip to Hawaii so he would be like away when it released cuz he was afraid he was afraid but it made it open number one it made 23 million dollars its opening weekend it's made its money back to turn a profit its first weekend.

Pat: And he said that was just a crazy he's like I kind of wish I'd been back in La then when I found out but then I'd let you know I didn't hear I paid for this and they have the rest of my week-long vacation.

Ash: I mean.

Ash: I know right.

Bret: Would you would you want to be in La finding out that your movie was awesome and everyone is making money or would you rather find out that you were making a ton of money and also in Hawaii like.

Pat: I know I'm like doubt other than to just really yeah I'm just going to know I'm going to spend.

Ash: Says nobody in Hawaii.

Pat: Now I'm going to eat lobster three meals a day.

Josh: We just want to look like Bob Dylan I'm not showing up guys.

Ash: I would really like to see a remake with The Rock.

Bret: Okay but wilderock is who.

Ash: I don't care it does not matter.

Pat: You have to know the characters ass you can't just I'll wait they did just make up a random as character for the new movie that wasn't in the game.

Bret: The rock as Goro.

Ash: Doesn't matter he would be amazing.

Ash: So good.

Bret: I can see it I can see I can see him as Goro or Johnny they could do like Eddie Murphy situation and they can be both Goro and Johnny Cage.

Josh: Eddie Murphy is Kane.

Pat: How do we like Bridgette Wilson Bridgette Wilson Sampras.

Pat: Sonya Blade.

Josh: I thought you was great.

Josh: Okay she has the line.

Josh: Study this and then kicks a man in the chest like really cool really cool.

Bret: Winter stuff was really good and but then what they wrote her to do wasn't really good.

Sam: My favorite part with her character was when the wise old white man told her that her only flaw is that she's an independent woman.

Josh: We'll also Shang Tsung had taken her to the rail but he's like I choose to fight her and Raiden doesn't rain says you're a coward.

Ash: She grabs her hair and she's like.

Pat: Call when he's like yeah.

Josh: Thankfully the drug cartels didn't do that to her when she was fighting.

Pat: Cuz she did all her own stunts the actor she did.

Pat: All her own stunts and even she seems like she's pretty tough like IRL cuz it's apparently she she dislocated your shoulder during a scene but they just like regular Fix-It onset and she was just like I got this and I want for it.

Ash: Cuz I was going to say and I don't know because now that I've started working out I notice it but it really bothers me.

Bret: She was in a tank top ass that's how you know she's tough.

Sam: Also she probably has like 1ody fat ass so everything you're seeing on her is muscle.

Josh: Technically.

Sam: Sheetz.

Ash: True but she the girl does not look like she was waiting I'm just saying like all the men in the movie or like ripped to the f****** tea and I would just like the woman to also be ripped please.

Pat: I'm with you a hundred percent yes.

Bret: This is the 90's about the 90s had a different physique for the top person.

Ash: But this this happens in movies now like the Elena Holmes movie or whatever it's called with like.

Ash: FALSE.

Bret: Throw out there that it's possible that she was just well hydrated okay cuz if you look at like like the like the WWF wrestlers from the 90s the wrestlers there's some dudes words like okay I get wrestling fake but like they're obviously not Define muscular but they can lift a person over their head.

Josh: Jake the Snake Roberts.

Bret: There are few that there's a few of them.

Ash: Yeah but like men have like.

Bret: Nowadays it's like you have to deduct to hydrate yourself before the fight to greet like their veins like after look like super vascular and like.

Bret: Yeah she looks like she could kick your ass.

Ash: I'm just saying it would be nice or whatever lady actress I can't remember she looks ripped you know what I mean like like it can happen exactly.

Pat: She did.

Ash: Tired of this like Twiggy like arm saying and it's like no you are not blocking that punch from this dude.

Ash: Women.

Ash: Yes right.

Pat: She didn't need muscley arms she needed All She had she had with every badass woman in the 90s had she killed a man with her legs which apparently was with every woman dead in every 90s action movie.

Bret: Okay but.

Josh: I thought about GoldenEye.

Bret: Okay point-counterpoint though because I was going to give him a hard time about the sexy leg fighting but they came back in the same movie and have Liu Kang fight Sub-Zero a sexy leg fighting they had both genders.

Sam: But he didn't kill him with it.

Bret: But still they had he attempted she was just better at it.

Josh: Come on give me a break okay crunch.

Ash: Cow vagina killed someone.

Pat: 90s writers guys stop it just it just.

Ash: Yeah it is.

Pat: Trope of.

Pat: Man head between legs Snapback or squeeze them or something it's like Jesus God stop.

Josh: She's really got them by the balls.

Ash: I will say though I was like okay.

Bret: Yeah but then she pulled every other punch for the rest of the movie I don't think she threw another bunch.

Ash: No she just.

Pat: She did not get another fight which I realize that somebody asked.

Josh: I just put a corset on.

Pat: Given her.

Ash: 80s hair blowout.

Sam: Yeah I asked Brad I was like who had time to tease her hair.

Bret: His whole thing was like did they do he like static electricity or whatever.

Ash: I didn't make any sense it just the shot where we touch her with the hair and the new outfit was so comical that I just like burst out laughing.

Josh: Bring her back to me but make sure to do something with her hair.

Ash: Yeah.

Bret: There's definitely liked leading up into that final fight it kind of like there was a tournament Vibe going and then it was just like and then I reserve the right to not do the tournament anymore it just play Skip to the end and Liu Kang's like well if he doesn't if she doesn't accept the fight that they can't do the tournament and it's like rains like yeah I've got nothing more to teach you that you're really like the bylaws of Mortal Kombat.

Ash: The rules the basic rules of the game.

Josh: That's so much better than it just so much better than saying I don't know.

Josh: I teach you everything I could.

Josh: Your hand.

Bret: Talk to me for like 5 minutes dude.

Ash: Even the main characters.

Bret: What's this.

Ash: I also was not expecting the dark mark to make an appearance in the sky.

Bret: Now.

Ash: Harry Potter fan.

Bret: I miss I miss the rapper.

Josh: Okay okay this is this years ago that I had written down that was that last fight clearly was not a Flawless victory.

Pat: Yeah you definitely took some damage.

Josh: Like like yeah it made me think that off-camera they were like I don't think you know what that means.

Bret: He was just laughing at a dead man is what he was doing there.

Bret: Flawless Victory b**** what.

Josh: So much time.

Ash: I can respect that really really really have to talk about is the real MVP of this movie which was the production designer.

Ash: There are and I can't do this for only $8.

Bret: 18.

Ash: Still holy crap.

Josh: That 18 million would have led to Sean Connery by the way like if he was in Italy.

Bret: They really got every single inch out of out of the props and the set design and was great like.

Bret: I can't think of one set that was super weird except for maybe the forest but.

Bret: Like all of their internal sets.

Ash: I can just.

Bret: The Scouting For The Beach location was cool.

Ash: I can just imagine the set designer and like okay like there's so many candles and some of these scenes so many candles holyshit.

Bret: Scribe scorpions lair.

Ash: It feels like the Indiana Jones ride times a million.

Josh: This is where you hang out huh.

Pat: Scaffolding no Warehouse of scaffolding.

Pat: Cobwebs and Bones go.

Bret: 20 pirate ships crashed into each other.

Ash: It's like they're probably all good we're on the beach.

Pat: Need a flag cast where's my flag pass.

Josh: I am Paul Anderson you work for me.

Pat: And I want my flight path.

Bret: I think the only.

Ash: Production designer.

Bret: The weakest set that they had was probably throwing Goro off the cliff.

Josh: I'll give you the money fell sideways.

Pat: Is this the roiling clouds that go is it is that a thing isn't been stormy at all there storm clouds okay cool.

Bret: Am I miss remembering about the second film that like half of the film takes place on the walkway at the ferry first walkway of outworld.

Pat: No there's a lot there yeah.

Bret: Cuz I saw that and I was like wait I thought this was in the second movie and they kind of just like walked by it and where's where's the rest of this is more to this scene must be in the second movie.

Ash: The children at the end views with the flag.

Bret: They were at the beginning.

Josh: Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum.

Josh: The temple Pals.

Ash: See I think that's what so did he come from.

Bret: Yeah they had a whole conversation about it.

Pat: You left he was raised that usually born in that order the order of light.

Bret: That was the first 10 minutes of the movie Very explicitly.

Josh: Where they guilted him.

Pat: It literally said it was literally said you left you left the order and you went to America.

Bret: Can't believe you asked and then your brother stayed.

Ash: But I didn't it wasn't clear that that was in a different world like.

Bret: Washington a different world that was just the temple.

Josh: We blamed.

Pat: No way are you talking about Liu Kang sample or.

Bret: It's not on the island that was Liu Kang sample.

Pat: The islands they're back at the order of light Temple.

Pat: Looks like.

Sam: I agree.

Ash: At the very end there on the eyelids and all these children come running out with flat it's super confusing thank you Sam. Clear it is really confusing it seems like the temple and the island are the same place.

Bret: You got you got to throw it out here at that.

Pat: What they're not even is totally different like geography.

Bret: You got a f****** Laser GPS for Fifi Island.

Josh: You humans are so unpredictable.

Bret: You got Laser GPS rififi Island but eventually switch to a temple in a different location you think that's also there.

Sam: But they showed the temple in the background of the beach that's why it's confusing.

Bret: What's the different time there's a lot of temples in the smokes there isn't there are a lot of temples in this movie.

Pat: That Temple was on like an open field.

Pat: But they don't look alike.

Ash: Wow I wonder why we're confused f*** you.

Josh: What you mean you ran out of temples find me another.

Ash: Mentioned the temples look like they belong in Thailand as well so excuse me for confusing the fact that they look like they're from the same area.

Josh: Common misconception it's just a different realm copy the architecture.

Bret: I guess that would make sense cuz I was at Liu Kang's Temple news probably just like I really like this style like this back at home.

Josh: Annapolis wall outdoor volume or open playing.

Ash: This is my Island I can do whatever I want.

Josh: Vet veterans screaming.

Pat: You know it needs this more creepiest f*** statues just everywhere just f****** everywhere just creepy.

Ash: Oh my God that's what I'm saying. You look at the statues or like someone spent hours on that that single statue and there's 20 of them.

Josh: And the lizard ends up falling on top of it and getting stuck inside it like pulled inside of it and then becomes.

Ash: Statue.

Josh: Because the regular video game version of what reptile is like the CG was unnecessary they can just introduce them like that.

Pat: Yes that was a weird Choice a Shazam in the video game he just looks like he does when they're fighting he just looks like a green like Scorpion or Sub-Zero.

Pat: He's not he's not a lizard person that also that was like a.

Sam: Me to B2.

Ash: Let me tell you how confusing this was for someone who has zero information about the video game. The reptile thing works for the woman that was 10 000 years old not understand but they were different entities until halfway through the f****** movie.

Bret: He said watch to the thing it was obviously work for Shang Tsung.

Ash: No it was not obvious.

Pat: He literally said washer reptile.

Ash: But I thought she was the reptile I thought they were the same thing.

Bret: I don't know how to I don't know how to talk this back because.

Sam: I do.

Josh: Jesus is God.

Bret: We're in the same scene together.

Pat: They were in the same scene what no cuz she was sitting over to the side you thought Katana was reptile.

Ash: I thought that it was a part of her.

Sam: Yeah me too like she could I totally did and there was like well s*** he just killed that that reptile thing did he also kill the princess chick.

Bret: To be fair Sam was not paying attention to the movie at that time at because she was feeding the baby.

Sam: I was watching and also a few left.

Ash: Women can't multitask f*** off.

Sam: Also what what are you saying is if in this movie is so convoluted that if you look down for 3 seconds.

Ash: Yeah.

Sam: Can you have no f****** clue what's going on.

Josh: Oh my God I'm sorry I sneeze what's going on.

Ash: Thank you.

Ash: She was giving them.

Bret: Listen other movie shouldn't have to like say anything and lay it out and then reiterate it and then bring it back later Andre explain it.

Pat: I don't know why this tards he's a lizard that can go invisible and also he sent it and I'll.

Ash: She was giving them fucken side-eye and then and then they're like watch watch out she's a woman only gives you that look for a bad reason and then a f****** invisible lizard appears of course I'm going to connect them duh.

Sam: Yea Yea agreed.

Pat: He's like her guardian V.

Ash: Yes I thought it was like her familiar or something.

Bret: There's a scene in the middle of that.

Pat: I don't know why it was hard and then you get swallowed by a statue filled with bugs and becomes a green ninja why is retard about this it's it's so it's it's almost 1:00 is too with a tabby what what.

Ash: Yeah totally.

Sam: I also thought they were like they were like fancy statues were if they touched life then they suck their soul and became a fighter.

Josh: Wow.

Ash: Percent yes absolutely thought the same thing as well.

Bret: That might be true they really have that work.

Pat: Cuz it was the one I had like a little creature.

Josh: Play the games games explain everything.

Pat: They didn't they showed it until you see it and you infer from the visual context clues.

Ash: Vacuum.

Bret: I wasn't in the game.

Ash: This was like the hardest movie to follow in my city.

Pat: It's good guys bad guys fight the bad guys or loser our world gets destroyed.

Pat: Do you really think.

Ash: Everything in between is really confusing.

Bret: It all comes back to the bracket we needed the bracket.

Ash: Please.

Pat: There's plenty of little bulshit in the under the rug it if you would like lift that rug up.

Ash: Even hit points on the screen would have been nice.

Pat: Just put the rug down ass.

Bret: Light bar.

Josh: Not one person on that island scream Mortal Kombat like not one of them.

Josh: Mario combat.

Bret: It isn't very often that the videogame makes more sense than the movie.

Josh: Pictures of Kicking and punching.

Ash: Definitely I mean even like.

Pat: I still contend.

Bret: Video game has a bracket.

Ash: He would like the camera like angles but they chose times were so confusing like sometimes we have a POV shot of someone's knee and why do we have a POV of someone's name.

Bret: Awesome.

Pat: Yeah f****** rules.

Josh: I want to see what it's like from the news point of view.

Bret: As the viewer I want to kick someone in the face with my own face.

Bret: Kind of energy this movie brings okay.

Sam: That is accurate and that's.

Josh: Get out of my dreams.

Sam: And that's why I'm just going to come right out of the gate and say it yes it's confusing but also it doesn't even matter cuz it's just so f****** awesome.

Josh: Oh yes yes.

Pat: Yeah yeah yeah.

Josh: Wow I right.

Pat: Gyro seasoning.

Josh: Are we getting Mortal Kombat tattoos.

Pat: Think of it this way you're looking at a room that you want to be clean and picked up and if you're standing in the door looking into the room it looks really nice and clean and is finally it's a pretty room don't go lifting the rugs don't go pick up the rug and I'll go by the door again I find all kinds of dust bunnies under there like.

Ash: Are you telling me this is like the metaphor of a clean room.

Sam: No.

Pat: I think the main like the big picture the big fixture Good Guys bad guys fight the bad guys.

Bret: He saying it looks good from exactly one angle.

Pat: As soon as you start like putting on the white glove in like brushing like above the mantelpiece you're going to find some dirt like.

Josh: The Golden Girls house was in a real house in oh.

Sam: It's it's like trying to look for the Healthy nutrition and a brownie like don't don't look for the fiber count don't look for the vitamins.

Ash: Is protein from the egg right.

Pat: You're the one egg spread out across the entire play.

Sam: Exactly don't look for those macros just enjoy it for the brownie sugary goodness that it is and that's what Mortal Kombat is.

Sam: No nutritional value just sugar and awesomeness.

Josh: Are we talking about.

Pat: Men make that a f****** poster Mortal Kombat brownie sugary goodness.

Josh: Mortal Kombat what does it mean to you.

Sam: New tagline.

Josh: Mortal Kombat 2.

Josh: I feel like we're all little Mortal Kombat.

Pat: So the people who haven't seen his do you want me to stop us talking about about characters and actors and performers coming back to reprise their roles for small parts and performance not coming back do you want to know.

Bret: It's not worth it.

Pat: Sandy.

Josh: Victory.

Sam: Yes I would like to know.

Pat: Listen to skip ahead 30 seconds and I always inform 1998 immediately killed in the opening scene.

Ash: As he should have been in this movie.

Pat: Yes right there with the emperor bursting through yeah.

Ash: Really.

Sam: Just.

Bret: The second movie opens right where this one left off so it was right then that he died.

Pat: It's it takes up the second movie of picks up right where this movie ends and Johnny immediately is killed.

Sam: Solid fats.

Pat: And what's hilarious is.

Ash: That would have been a better ending to the.

Ash: No.

Pat: What's hilarious is it's a hole through line that Sonia's like really upset about it was in love with him it's like they never actually do that in this first movie they never like actually follow through with that Sonia is not Bridget does not reprise her role as a different performer Raiden is a different performer it's James Remar who you would recognize him he's.

Ash: Amina Sam said does it matter.

Ash: Matter.

Bret: Get jacks.

Pat: Ajax with big metal arms.

Bret: You got big arms you got metal arms.

Bret: Bucky Barnes.

Pat: Jax has one of Sony's Partners excuse config at 2 but he's to Bucky barnes's alarms.

Bret: To have puppies.

Pat: Going to Casting though I completely forgot this so so so Bridgette Wilson had the conflict initially issues auditioning.

Pat: Cameron Diaz was cast in this role.

Bret: Wyatt.

Pat: Broke her wrist while training for it.

Josh: And she probably thought this was my only chance.

Sam: Wow.

Bret: That's crazy.

Josh: Hey everybody don't give up don't give up.

Josh: Cameron Diaz avoided Mortal Kombat.

Bret: I've been a very.

Ash: I don't know I don't know that I can say that it would have been better I don't know.

Bret: Princess Kitana horrible.

Pat: She's stoic.

Ash: Yeah she kept being like use the element that brings life and I was like what the f*** are you talking about what are you talkin about.

Josh: And also why are you keeping it a secret.

Ash: Yes.

Bret: In fairness if it if it was strong enough coming out it would have had the same effect.

Sam: Are you saying you're going to ejaculate somebody to death.

Pat: But to the point though there's.

Bret: I'm not saying me I'm saying lucane with his Kung Fu training and blast it.

Josh: Yeah.

Sam: Siri that Superman can't actually have sex with anybody because if he came he didn't murder them okay.

Ash: Yes.

Bret: This is this the Superman sperm problem but in Mortal Kombat.

Sam: Right.

Ash: Punches The Forum guy in the dick right he's like now and I'm like what was it like rock hard or something what.

Josh: Actually guys I wrote a note that just says it's a dick thing.

Ash: She's just being a dick.

Pat: But I do like there's literally no reason for Katana to be all cryptic when she's like fake fighting with Liu Kang could like it's his dumb she's she's passing a note that could get intercepted like I got to use them code here or be like cryptic about it is little she can just be like use the water use.

Josh: Go back into water and what he doesn't think.

Bret: It also feels crazy lucky that turned into a spear of water because I feel like is his powers freezing stuff right his powers in like forcefield he could have thrown a knife Adam you could have thrown just like a rock Adam bucket.

Pat: Also sun and air are.

Ash: No and like I feel like Waters the element that brings life is like I mean yes but like I don't know.

Josh: Israel cocktail.

Sam: But I mean.

Bret: Sun isn't an element Pat.

Bret: I hope you didn't put that in space trip because that is not an element.

Ash: It is now can it be in in Zion.

Ash: I love it.

Bret: Final thoughts that you loved it.

Bret: Not at the 90s.

Josh: Progressive time.

Sam: No I have 5 final thoughts I really enjoyed this movie did I follow it till I understand it no did I care no it was the soundtrack was dumping it was so good and I cannot believe that was written for the movie like that was very impressive I am impressed at how influential this phone was on future movies like The Matrix and impressed with all of the effects like ash said in the backgrounds and the props that were made for that budget and it made me really smart artistic decisions they had limited budget and they knew where to put it and they got a lot out of it I am impressed as hell with this movie or are there problematic things yes whitewashing yes sexism yes but you know I know what I would never run into those things so yeah but I still enjoyed it and it just it's a it's a candy fluff delicious movie to watch there's little substance and it's just all entertainment.

Pat: How dare you.

Ash: Bad movie the dialogue was like it's funny because I simultaneously had a horrible like a horrible time following this movie also the dialogue being so Exposition heavy at times like it's just ridiculous.

Josh: Playing catch up.

Ash: Just so bad but.

Ash: I guess I did enjoy myself watch and Bryson we made fun of it the entire time.

Ash: If you play the video games.

Bret: The most you get from having played the video games beforehand is recognizing when they do something from the video game.

Ash: But I did really like succeed with the guy turned into just like a skull and then exploded I mean I wish the whole movie like stated that caliber cuz that was.

Josh: Natural causes.

Ash: Like I wanted him to rip that I wanted the for I am armed guy to rip that one guy just in hats that destroy but instead he just like punches them.

Bret: So did I hear that the new one.

Bret: Better by that.

Josh: Oh my God yes.

Josh: It's wild.

Pat: I mean yeah it's super is it's our it's a hard r.

Josh: Hold the door.

Ash: I think it's a fun movie to watch with friends would not recommend it otherwise.

Pat: It was fun I enjoyed it was very nostalgic I'm sorry I do have one times for the fact Sam thank you for pointing out how amazing you had the soundtrack just just just a banger it is actually the one that.

Pat: Two different record labels that went to Sony and Virgin Records they they wanted to use like popular they wanted to use like Janet Jackson or Van Halen but the producers were like no this needs to be like an EDM type thing they went to a group called tvt record this is the first Platinum EDM record ever.

Sam: Bret totally called that I was like dang I'm not surprised this movie was this popular with the soundtrack and Brett said he was like I think this was most people's introduction to electronic music and yeah.

Sam: Yes.

Pat: Nailed it man I'm going to listen to pull it up on Spotify tomorrow for sure I like working out or something definitely.

Josh: How productive you are.

Pat: I don't want to write with a going so I like break the keyboard.

Pat: No.

Josh: Multi-platinum.

Pat: I had a lot of fun watching it it's it's.

Pat: It's got just as many flaws but they didn't bother me.

Pat: I'm at watch the terrible sequel I don't know it's not good but watch it.

Pat: It's not good.

Bret: And there's there's two there's two animated movies.

Pat: That's right.

Ash: Yeah I mean I typed it into HBO which is the right one.

Bret: Mortal Kombat the first movie Mewtwo Strikes Back.

Pat: What a crossover.

Josh: MK OG.

Ash: Baytown.

Bret: Yai.

Bret: This movie is.

Bret: Not as good as I remember and also still thoroughly enjoyable sorry ask.

Josh: I said Don't listen to.

Bret: The acting on almost everyone's part is terrible like very bad but except for.

Bret: Amazing the mugging the faces so good I actually did think Sonia's actress did pretty good.

Bret: And for some reason I really like it was Goofy but it was it was fun to watch and that's it was a very large cast in this.

Ash: I just watch this movie and I have no idea.

Bret: I feel like I feel like.

Bret: When we watch Twilight.

Josh: This is your chance to re-watch.

Bret: Watch Twilight.

Bret: My thing was that it was enjoyable for the extreme dunk ability of that movie but this one's almost hard to dunk on because they didn't have enough to dunk on like a because some of the stuff was so good.

Bret: Like the set design who cares about the story in a fight movie like I think that's really what it comes down to I want to see sophisticut Throne I want to see people get hurt and because I've played the game I want to see the Scorpion go get over here.

Bret: Randy Macho Man Savage you know like.

Ash: That's the only thing that you said over and over again.

Josh: Oh yeah cuz he's in the game he says come here.

Josh: And then in the movie he goes over here.

Pat: Uno he says get over here and the other one when he throws the thing he does get over here yeah.

Josh: Oh I thought it has come down here in the first one but the last one he says on here.

Pat: Daddy does not say the games.

Bret: But there is some stuff that caught me off guard in this that was really enjoyable like ash brought up the statue eating the body and turning into a character and like I was at.

Josh: I was pissed till now.

Bret: Turning into a character and they pulled from the games where I feel like a lot of movies.

Bret: When they use the environment it's just like an obstacle or they're running through it but they really interacted with a lot of the environment in this movie the spike floor reptiles scorpions bedroom whatever the fact that was like five levels is in there.

Bret: Some really fun clever stuff with this movie that made what would have been a really stupid boring movie into chest a really fun thing to watch that even if it didn't make the most sense and then they knew when it's when they stop making sense when they knew you were going to question they will just bring back in the theme song because.

Bret: So I liked it I'd watch it again if someone wanted to watch with me it's one of those ones I don't think I'd watch by myself but like it's a good.

Josh: It's so scary.

Bret: It's a good friend movie.

Ash: Yeah it's a good get drunk with friends that watch movie for sure.

Pat: That's what I just did.

Pat: No you.

Bret: Youz Guyz.

Pat: A bed.

Bret: What do you think.

Josh: Man I I went into it with a really good attitude and I'm glad that I did because it allowed me to forgive you know I'm going to give it to him I will say that the last fight with Liu Kang and Shang Tsung you know that those two actors they like looked at each other and were like we've got to save this martial arts movie like first martial arts I've ever seen in a movie and they just like go full-throttle whenever Full Throttle is for them specifically and I think that like I kind of enjoyed the last fight aside from the cartoonish like kicking of the stomach and until he goes out of the spikes you know but I think it's the best movie ever made.

Bret: Well that was Mortal Kombat thank you Josh for joining us.

Josh: Like you is like Feels Like Home.

Bret: Would you would you like to tell our listeners where can I find you.

Josh: Absolutely I'm on Instagram it's fresh knuckle sammich.

Pat: Great handle.

Josh: Fresh underscore underscore sammich.

Bret: Excellent.

Josh: And that's it that's your life. That's the only thing I got in my life.

Bret: One question we didn't I didn't.

Bret: Like we asked enough at the beginning is there like a movie that you would tell people that you worked on that you were like stoked about.

Josh: My first my first television job was Finding Bigfoot.

Bret: Finding Bigfoot.

Josh: Yeah like that was a wild wild sad like.

Josh: Editing really save that one.

Josh: Animal Planet.

Ash: Did you say that you also worked on Game of Thrones.

Josh: I watched a good quality control for it.

Sam: You see are you the one responsible for the Starbucks cup on the banquet table.

Pat: Hahaha.

Josh: It's what everybody says luckily I left the industry before then so you can blame them for not keeping me not giving me enough incentives.

Pat: We dusted did they find them to Define Bigfoot.

Josh: We did we did we did what we had to kill him so we can get canceled.

Josh: Nobody's watching found Bigfoot.

Bret: I gave the audience please.

Ash: Yeah so you can also follow us on Twitter where at let's pray watch where we do stuff like us choose the movie I will treat a still from from it and see who guesses it first and this time it was Chris good job Chris you were the first one to come in but also Kudos or two.

Ash: Stormageddon our dear friend Matt stormageddon.

Bret: Is this a new is this a new Chris Chris sounds new I think that's a new interactor Hello Krista welcome to the show.

Bret: Chris is the new match.

Ash: Yeah and you know what I don't know that Chris wants me to tell everybody's everybody has handled I feel like I've seen him interact with us on Twitter before congratulations Chris.

Bret: Match.

Ash: Guess on this one Mitch where are you also John Dunning good job you also got it right but you good job.

Bret: You know what if the answers are in the tweets above no good job I revoke.

Ash: You would be surprised how often I don't think people this the thread of replies.

Pat: Yeah I mean they might have said they would see your Tweet and there was the only know what that is reply in hit send and they wouldn't see the.

Ash: Exactly.

Pat: Everyone here that a right answer and register to take it away from you tweeted and f*** you.

Bret: I welcome and I welcome your hate.

Sam: If you liked our.

Ash: Pump Up the Jam.

Bret: Cancel me b******.

Sam: If you would like or if I guess please give us a 5-star review on Ice no apple podcast.

Sam: Or Google podcast.

Sam: I still chuckling over our newest review that just says Sam Sam Sam Sam Sam I don't know who you are but it's I'm trying to figure it out it's great.

Ash: Appreciate you Sam.

Pat: Hey this show it's part of the certain pov. Com network of shows go do certain pov. Com and check out other fun shows like fun and games podcast with Matt and Jeff Man of Steel screen snarks Saturday morning confidential judging book covers and a host of other amazing shows made by a very delightful and wonderful human being.

Bret: Also.

Pat: Yeah we got a couple I mention them Squarespace.

Bret: Also because now there's a potential that me and Patty get paid for it but me and him do a show on Twitch on Thursdays and we've been doing it for like over a year don't be jealous.

Ash: I'm just depressed.

Pat: Yeah we playing D&D.

Bret: Thursday's 2 p. M. Eastern D&D bat plays a guy that my character relentlessly makes fun of.

Ash: Not that different.

Bret: Twitch. Com geeklyinc.

Pat: Yo it's twitch. Tv / kikuyu.

Bret: Put that TV dammit Justin. TV.

Ash: Paid.

Pat: I forget that all the f****** time but which used to be Justin TV.

Bret: Twitch. Tv / geeklyinc alright.

Bret: Join us next week when I unlock my phone and switch tabs to the thing that had the movie that we're going to watch next week in it when we watch NYC tornado Terror.

Pat: You had your phone to remember that.

Bret: Okay.

Bret: I had to scroll through like 500 movie names to find a funny one and that wasn't even very funny.

Sam: Assigned to non-pornographic title.

Bret: The first one I picked out was pouring so yes.

Bret: The Nutty Professor.

Ash: I don't think it's not a problem.